Why I Write & Other Shit

13 Jun

I say I have been writing for over 30 years, but really it has been much longer than that. I have been writing since I could speak in consecutive sentences. I wrote my first novel when I was 5. Well, I would have if my Kindergarten teacher hadn’t taken away 2/3rds of my construction paper. How was I to know that when she told us to go and pick supplies from the art cupboard to make a book, she meant a pamphlet. I guess the confusion lay in the fact, that I was already reading books on my own by then, and they weren’t picture books. So in my mind, I was getting enough paper to write something along the lines of “The Wizard of Oz” but with more cats, and horses made out of the night sky and emeralds.

I wrote all the way through my childhood. I wrote plays for hand puppets. I attempted a Nancy Drew type novel but with real ghosts, not people pretending to be ghosts, so that they could find the hidden treasure in the old house undisturbed, and my heroine was never a blonde.

I penned a series of fairytales and science fiction stories. Basically, I wrote everything I wished I could be reading. It wasn’t because I didn’t love the books I did read. It was just that I wanted more magic, or less logical explanation for the magic. I wanted my science fiction to be all aliens with no humans. I wanted my little girl characters to be as interesting as adult characters, just shorter. This is still something that defines my work.

Until I hit adolescence, and then I wrote to try and understand the people in my world and myself because at the age of eleven, just like Alice, I fell down the rabbit hole, only I didn’t end up in Wonderland, or maybe I did. Regardless of the shit, there has always been an abundance of magick.

I do not write because I love words. I write because I am obsessed with communication and I am fascinated by people. This holds true for what I read as well. I will never be a grammar fascist because I will do backflips in order to understand what someone is trying to say to me. I have no problem translating missing commas. I will even resort to drawing pictures and playing charades if need be.

Writing helps me process intense emotional experiences, my reactions to people, their behaviour, personalities, society, politics, ad infinitum and in many cases to resolve them.

If I can turn pain, rage, humiliation, into something so genuinely funny that it becomes relatable and not merely self indulgent then I have reached my creative goal.

I don’t believe there are no original ideas. There may be universal themes but there are always new directions to take them. There are always new things to be learned from an old stereotype.

A couple of months ago, I decided I was going to be a full-time writer/performer. I have not given myself a deadline. I have given myself a commitment. I am working out a structure, teaching myself about the business side of art, changing my outlook on money, creativity and  leaving the door open for magickal possibilities. Am I scared? Sure. But that’s why I became Danger Girl, when she is afraid she merely applies lipstick and laughs. I have 12 tubes of MAC lipstick in various shades including one called Lady Danger.

XO

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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